Not much of an update, Just a "Pity Me" post

So, I'm starting work at my step-mom's store, and it's the nightshift, like my last job. So tonight I am trying my best to stay up as late as I can so I can get enough sleep tomorrow before work. It's from 10-6, but gaaaah.. I hate working the night shift.. it's all sleeping and working that's about it. And it's so far away from my house.

I live way out in the east end, and the store is like right down town. I might have to stay at Rob's the days I have to work... ungh.. I'm never gonna get to go home, am I?

I kind if wish i had a boyfriend... I mean, like a month ago, I decided i didn't want a boyfriend yet, or anytime soon.. but I sit here, alone.. feeling lonely..
It's almost unbearable at some moments.. to be lonely. And it really doesn't help that I like to listen to slow songs that sing about either sappiness, or have that "Come back to me" sound, or stuff like that. It's just so depressing to think especially, tha I'm sitting here, still alone and my ex has gone BACK to the girl who cheated on him... but I am alone... He has someone, my brother and sister have someone, my dad and step-mum just celebrated their first year anniversary.. my mum practically lives with her boyfriend...
It sucks... I am alone.. I dont even have my cat cause I can never get home long enough for him to even cuddle with me...

I feel like a bag of crap... this is what sitting by myself, late at night does to someone who suffers from depression.. Makes them feel like the deepest, biggest bag of shit on the planet... I hate me sometimes.. I need a smoke.. but have none... ungh...